This is one of those things that I spent a lot time pretending I didn’t like, because I was more than a little embarrassed.

And sometimes I am reticent and confused.

It’s been almost a year now since the last time I tried waxplay.

The last time, I had to perform it on myself while the thief watched. There’s something a lot more daunting about doing it that way. You would think that being in relative control of the candle would make the experience a little less intimidating, but you tend to actually have a lot less control over the candle when your hand is shaking than you’d like.

We started with it over my breasts, on my nipples. I shivered when started to drip onto my thighs. I protested when he suggested I put it on my clit. I had never done that before or had anyone put the wax there. When I finally agreed, I swear I saw white the moment the wax made contact with my clit. I cried out, my body shook, and I wound up spilling more wax on my thigh and over my slit.

“I’m proud,” the thief said, “and, damn, that looks awesome.” He gestured to the wax that covered my body. I blushed and chuckled.

I think I am way overdue for another experience like that.

Since apparently SG will sleep with anything…

The thief: I sort of wish I could hug you, wrap you in a blanket and feed you pizza and cheap red wine.
Me: Ugh, you’re going to make me cry.
The thief: I’m really not sure I can cheer you up, unless i do the following: I hereby solemnly swear that I will never, ever, EVER hook up with SG behind your back.

This is the story of the thief and the girl he took home to his partner-in-crime.

Who they were very good to, albeit a little strict.

And who he kept for a time and then returned, because being a villain is rarely as black and white as the pictures.

But who he kept a little piece of. Which is just fine, since she took a little piece of him, too.

Because when you really boil things down, we all are, in our own ways, thieves. Some of us are just better dressed for the part.

Dear Followers,

Thank you so much for your messages of support, empathy, understanding and your incredibly kind words. It means a lot to me that you’re all so sweet and caring. I feel so privileged.

Last night was a little rough for me. A long-standing little unofficial tradition the thief and I had was broken and it hit me a little hard. It’s strange not to have that feeling of belonging that had become so familiar.

In other news, I gave up alcohol for Lent. So, yeah, let the dry days begin.

<3, Ivy

I know I’ve just revealed him recently, tumblr, but the thief and I will not continue with our current arrangement. Simply put, I will not be submitting to him anymore.

It hurts the both of us, but it’s the best step right now. He has things to attend to in his current relationship and I do not want to exacerbate anything that’s going on there. He and I are still very close, still care very much about each other, etc.

My goodness, I feel like a parent explaining their divorce.

But, yeah, we’re okay on an interpersonal level. However, personally, I’m a little bit shaken up. There’s a feeling you get from submitting to someone and you get that deep. After about nine months, we had settled into a groove and had become quite attached to each other. To be totally honest, my heart is hurting.

So, you know, be a little patient with me, tumblr. I’m feeling fragile.

<3, Ivy

The thief likes to make me do this.

Kneeling, ass up, back arched, hands spreading myself apart, mouth open. It emphasizes vulnerability, availability, openness. I’m not allowed to speak when I do it, just listen and receive.

At first, I wasn’t too into the idea. I didn’t like how, after a few minutes, having my mouth open would make me drool. I didn’t enjoy just how exposed and small it made me feel.

However, since then, it’s grown on me. Sometimes, I don’t want it to end. It’s just so very simple. And when I seem a bit overwhelmed to him or when I have too much on my mind, he’ll stop what he’s doing and have me get into this position. It centers me. I don’t even mind the drooling anymore.

This is the story of the thief and the girl he took home to his partner-in-crime.

It’s such a shame. I have a horrible tendency to root for the villain.

So, I am going to be writing more sexy prose on this tumblr than sexy memoir/personal experience. This is basically how it’s been going on here, but the personal content will be cut down.

I have decided to withdraw myself from the hookup scene for a little while. While I once found this aspect of my sexuality very freeing, it is right now not serving me the way it used to. This year has been rough for me. Some very close people to me have passed away, some issues have come up in my family, some relationships have been broken off or been strained and my academics are becoming incredibly difficult. While I am managing academically just fine, personally I have been under some duress. I do not want to be using my sexuality as a coping mechanism. It’s not healthy and it honestly ruins the experience.

Moreover, I have been debating some aspects of my relationship with the Southern Gentleman and how they are panning out. The issues are not of the nature of the material on this tumblr, so I will not be discussing them here. I am unsure if I want to continue a physical relationship with him.

However, I have left off of this tumblr the fact that I am owned. (Surpriseeee). Well, not entirely. There’s a lot of subtle hints, interactions, etc. We are not each others’ primaries, but I consider the relationship to be fairly healthy and admire him greatly as a friend and confidante. He has been incredibly supportive, flexible and kind through what has been going on. I may start to go a bit more into detail on my relationship with him on here. But, please don’t hold me to that.

With this in mind, I hope you’ll all still stick around. You’ll be getting most of the regularly broadcasted stuff, I promise. You’ve all really been supportive of me and, as I come up on the one-year anniversary of this tumblr, I am so grateful to have all of you here.

<3, Ivy