I’m over the whole concept of the infallible dom. The whole strong man stereotype who is always right and never messes up and is suave every moment of every day. Men who demand that sort of esteem are a little absurd, and a culture that perpetuates that role is harmful to both these people and the people that love them.

Bottom line: I love that he trips. I love that she smirks. And I love that he is sometimes that domineering presence and sometimes, yeah, he’s a guy who hasn’t quite gotten the hang of a punching bag just yet.

I’m not trying to assume anything here and if I’m off base then just ignore this, but don’t you worry about hurting your wife? My wife keeps telling me she wants it rough and I’m trying, but I refuse to hurt her. How do you do it and still sleep at night?

romanticdominant-deactivated201:

When Tori and I were first starting to explore D/s, I worried myself sick that I would indeed hurt her at some point and never be able to forgive myself.

She is my world and I love her more than life so, yes, it was a VERY difficult thing to reconcile in my head. I love her, but I hit her? WTF?

For a long time, I discounted the idea that anyone could find pleasure through pain, but I have had to eat those words. Please don’t misunderstand, I would NEVER, EVER really harm Tori, but within the confines of safe, sane and consensual play, rough, dominant behavior from me took our sex to a level I could never have imagined.

What I came to understand and accept was that the level of force Tori and I needed was not something that could cause real damage. For us, dominance and control was what made our D/s work.

In addition, we ALWAYS approached anything new slowly and with great caution. She had her safeword and I absolutely trusted her to use it if things went too far and she absolutely trusted me to stop immediately if she used it.

Whenever we play, her safety is my first priority. I NEVER scene with her if my head isn’t completely in the right zone. Anger, frustration, impatience etc. have no place in D/s. You must be in control of your emotions, the scene, everything or postpone till you’re ready.

Pride is the sexiest feeling. Outdoing yourself and surprising yourself are such rewarding things during kink. And encouragement and recognition is so, so, so important.

pimpmypaws:

I love Maitresse Madeline. Not only is she ridiculously sexy, but she really brings out the best in her partners. Melina Mason kept crying at the beginning and Maitresse kept stopping to comfort her (per Kink.com shooting rules) before ramping up the intensity again, but as she was flogging her she kept saying things like ‘Look at how strong you are!’ and calling Melina powerful and telling her how turned on she was. And you could tell Melina was absolutely loving it, even calling it the best sex she’d ever had in the closing interview.

“You know I win,” he says, “I always win.”

And no matter how much I fuss and pout and argue, I know he’s absolutely right.

Sir and I play a little game sometimes that’s just a drop too taboo and way too blushy to write about.

in-morpheus-arms:

yourclassyslut

The Party Sub, Part Eight

While I was being hogtied on the floor, a few people approached Sir and asked him while he still had his clothes on. He wasn’t the only person there still fully clothed, but I guess people were curious because I’d basically been in a complete state of undress since midnight.

This girl that Sir and I kind of know cut him off before he could explain, declaring that it was “cmnf” and insisting that he not remove his clothes. She was pretty vehement about it, too.

So, ah, I guess somebody else was enjoying it, too?

Tonight’s my last night with Sir for a while.

We’re sitting beside each other on his couch: reading tumblr, snuggling, sneaking some touches. I’m going to miss him a lot and we’re not sure yet exactly when we’ll see each other again date-wise.

I’ve sustained a few little bumps and bruises from today. Nothing major, but enough to let me be a pouty girl and put this photo of a girl with a very bruised ass up and pretend that I can identify with her.

But, crap, I’m going to miss him a lot.

My life.

Sir told me the other day that I was lovingly owned.

Just kind of been melting over that for the past week or so.

I should mention that Sir and I are starting to explore something new with our dynamic. A few years ago, I used to like being more of a “slave” than a “sub,” but I got burned pretty hard by some people and it drove me away. I got really, really scared about putting that much trust in someone like that again, and so I completely resisted entering into that sort of dynamic again. But, I’ve always craved it and wished I could have it.

A few weeks ago, I admitted this to Sir. I was stressed out and I was craving that release of just serving someone. I kept asking him to just take control and he kept asking me what I meant. The whole time, I was shaking because I was so scared to let myself feel that again. But, I admitted it to him.

I told him about how I wanted to feel more like property, about how cherished that used to make me feel. I admitted I used to let myself get pushed deeper into subspace, that I used to hold off on backing out of beatings just because they started to really hurt, that I used to value obedience and service. But I had my trust betrayed and I completely withdrew and closed off to it.

It’s been a process of me first admitting this to myself, and now admitting it to him. Sir has been so patient and loving and I’m so proud to be owned by him. I have no interest in calling him Master, but we’ve been exploring that new dynamic now. And I get super nervous when we do, but I’m excited. And I’m so, so happy I can start to trust someone that way again.

Ivy

Just another Adult Content site

dynamic

I’m not trying to assume anything here and if I’m off base then just ignore this, but don’t you worry about hurting your wife? My wife keeps telling me she wants it rough and I’m trying, but I refuse to hurt her. How do you do it and still sleep at night?