Hi, can I have a life that involves more naked, grindy couch-flirting?
flirtation
And, yes, I’m feeling better.
ChatMe: OH MY GOD (hot guy from orgy) AND (hot girl from orgy) JUST BOTH ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK PEEING JUST A LITTLE BIT
Me: AND HE DID FIRST
Me: So in my head I’m like clearly he added me and then was like, “oh yeah, (hot girl who is his partner), add her.”
Sir: Haha yeah he just accepted me, too.
Sir: I’m not flirting with them until two days from now.
Sir: 3 day motherfucking rule.
Me: HIGH FIVE SAME HERE.
(aka I probably won’t have the balls to flirt with them ever because my last encounter with them was really blushy but that’s okay.)
This past Saturday night, after my super awesome best date, I took a little trip to celebrate a friend from Ivy University’s birthday. There, out of nowhere, while I’m catching up with some friends, I run into The Grown Up. Turns out he’s friends with the birthday boy.
He’s spent some time out of the country, my schedule’s been busy, blah blah. Either way, he had given me his number and I had never called it. But we’ve run into each other a few times and he’s always friendly and lovely.
Welp, I got a little liquid confidence in me and asked him why we haven’t hung out. To which he replied that he didn’t have my number. Oops.
“But, you could give it to me,” he said, “since you don’t seem to know how to use the phone.”
I grinned, “where’s the fun in that? Here, you can guess my number and then call me the next time you’re around Ivy University.”
I proceeded to go through each number by giving him a hint about it. Such as, the number of continents or "if you write this number out and look at it really fast it looks like sex".
“This is incredibly attractive to me,” he said with a snort as he reached the sixth number.
I shook my head, “I’m not flirting with you, I’m just challenging your mind.”
“Okay, Ivy,” he chuckled, “okay.”
I had a text exchange with the Southern Gentleman, who likes to pretend our little fiasco didn’t happen and tries to talk to me normally. Which, ugh, I don’t know. Maybe that’s a good thing. He tried to uncomfortably sext me about three weeks ago and I was literally disgusted.
Recently, I made an okcupid account since there isn’t much else to do around here and I have what should be a really great date coming up with what seems like an awesome, smart, sane guy. But, when SG asked me if I was seeing anyone while he was texting me today, I responded with: “no, the only relationship I’m in is with my numerous vices.”
“I hope to be one of those vices,” he texted right back.
I rolled my eyes and texted: “I bet you do.”
SG replied with: “Look at you, all coy.”
It’s funny how guys can sometimes confuse coyness and ambivalence.
“Sometimes I have the feeling that we’re in one room with two opposite doors and each of us holds the handle of one door, one of us flicks an eyelash and the other is already behind his door, and now the first one has but to utter a word and immediately the second one has closed his door behind him and can no longer be seen. He’s sure to open the door again, for it’s a room which perhaps one cannot leave. If only the first one were not precisely like the second, if he were calm, if he would only pretend not to look at the other, if he would slowly set the room in order as though it was a room like any other; but instead he does exactly the same as the other at his door, sometimes even both are behind the doors and the beautiful room is empty.” – Franz Kafka, in a letter to Milena Jesenska.
Last night was so wonderful and such a nice way to relax before finals. We drank, we laughed, we had a ball. I do not yet have the chutzpah to post a picture of myself in my dress to my sex blog so I can possibly be identified, but I was told I looked lovely.
Especially by this friend of mine. The one who wants to paint me. In an encounter that could’ve turned into something naughty had her date not walked in. (Pshhh boys stink).
There’s another event tonight. That guy from my frat will probably be going and despite the fact that a friend said the real reason he dipped out was finances, I loudly and drunkenly announced at the table that I wouldn’t touch him unless he promised me three hours of cunnilingus. So I guess I have to make good on that now…whoops.
After my mother left, I went out with a bunch of friends and just danced for hours. It was probably one of the best nights out I’ve had all year, we all just let loose.
At some point, I caught up with that guy in my frat. I know, followers, I know, I swore myself off him earlier this week. But, according to one of my friends, he talks about me nonstop when I’m not around. I don’t think I can honestly fault him for going out and having some random hookup when we aren’t even together.
Anyway, right away he asked, “why didn’t you introduce me to your mother?”
I laughed and shook my head. “You could’ve come over and introduced yourself like everyone else.”
“You should’ve introduced me,” he insisted. “I didn’t want to be rude and come over.”
“How noble,” I replied.
He shrugged, “I thought she’d want to meet the guy who is taking you to the formal.”
“Oh, so now you’re taking me to the formal?” I raised a brow.
“If you’ll let me.”
One of my friends was waving me back over to the dance floor. I smiled and started to walk over, but not before saying, “only if you’re a gentleman.”
So, I met a guy the other night.
StandardLike a real guy. A grown-up guy with a grown-up job.
This sounds really, really silly. But, honestly, after all the random college stuff, I found myself feeling incredibly immature around him. And he’s only about four years older but, for all the times guys my age tell me I’m precocious and intimidating, I actually felt like a kid.
Because he was all “oh, I like to cook for women” and “I’m really into listening to jazz music”. I’m totally into both. But he wants to settle down like yesterday.
And, while he totally made fun of me for getting a little tipsy and stepping right out of one of my shoes (in my defense, they’re a little on the big side), he was actually able to keep up with my sense of humor and made college guys seem like a bunch of toddlers. Which, no offense to any of my followers, they are.
I’m really not down for the settling down thing or the getting into a serious relationship with someone who is done with grad school and has a career thing, but I see no harm in exploring this. Even SG was like, “please go for it”.
And I will. I’m just being a little coy before responding to his call.
Here’s to acting like a grown-up.
That guy from my frat and I have a sort of banter going on, explains my friend. We’re interesting to watch, sometimes in a funny way and sometimes in a slightly painful way. We don’t always go easy on each other.
Today, he sat down with some friends of mine and I and we proceeded to go at it with each other. There’s something about someone who comes so close to being able to outwit me that incredibly turns me on. Intelligence is terribly, terribly sexy. So is confidence.
When he left, one of my friends threw his hands up in the air and cried out in frustration, “would you two just fuck already?”
Guess what I’m stuck thinking about now.
Seriously, take me back. Maybe I would be less jaded about the whole notion of courtship. Sometimes I just wish things were left more to mystery.
Teen party, 1940s