Dear Tumblr,
In high school, I had an eating disorder. I kept the entire ordeal quiet. I didn’t tell a lot of people what I was going through. I didn’t want to burden people with it and mostly I didn’t want to acknowledge it myself.
While I make sure that I eat healthy now and that my physique reflects an active lifestyle rather than a hungry one, a ton of the psychological feelings remain. Inadequacy. Rampant perfectionism. Unrealistic standards.
It hurts when someone I was seeing saw a picture of me when I was “sick” and made a comment along the lines of, “wow, when was this taken? You look…great.” I know I’m attractive, in shape, appealing, etc, but it really makes me falter when I feel like I could be *better*.
But I’m moving farther and farther away from wanting to be “a mermaid” and closer to the realization that they don’t exist, that they’re conflicted, that things are just simpler as “a whale”.
Simply put, this story was beautiful. It got me thinking. I hope it will get some of you thinking, too.
<3, Ivy
A while back, at the entrance of a gym, there was a picture of a very thin and beautiful woman. The caption was “This summer, do you want to be a mermaid or a whale?”
The story goes, a woman (of clothing size unknown) answered the following way:
“Dear people, whales are always surrounded by friends (dolphins, seals, curious humans), they are sexually active and raise their children with great tenderness.
They entertain like crazy with dolphins and eat lots of prawns. They swim all day and travel to fantastic places like Patagonia, the Barents Sea or the coral reefs of Polynesia.
They sing incredibly well and sometimes even are on cds. They are impressive and dearly loved animals, which everyone defend and admires.Mermaids do not exist.
But if they existed, they would line up to see a psychologist because of a problem of split personality: woman or fish?
They would have no sex life and could not bear children.
Yes, they would be lovely, but lonely and sad.
And, who wants a girl that smells like fish by his side?Without a doubt, I’d rather be a whale.
At a time when the media tells us that only thin is beautiful, I prefer to eat ice cream with my kids, to have dinner with my husband, to eat and drink and have fun with my friends.
We women, we gain weight because we accumulate so much wisdom and knowledge that there isn’t enough space in our heads, and it spreads all over our bodies.
We are not fat, we are greatly cultivated.
Every time I see my curves in the mirror, I tell myself: “How amazing am I ?!
