but ugh

Standard

Spoken like a true viking wife

Me: Your beard is getting long. Gonna trim it soon?

Pup: Nah. I wanna grow it longer. Maybe braid it.

Me: Why are you doing this to me?

Pup: This has nothing to do with you.

Me: How long is this going to last?

Pup: I don’t know. At least a year.

Me: Well I’m not marrying you with a fucking braided beard.

Pup: You don’t want to marry me if I look like a viking?

Me: No, not at all.

Pup: That’s the spirit.

Me: You’re terrible.

Gallery

Craftsmate and Penthouse once made a little joke, much to my chagrin, on a certain tinychat about how people would read and write fan-fiction about them.

Or slash-fic. Whatever. Whatever the fuck this nonsense is called.

Either way, I refuse to let my sex life be co-opted into freaking spinoffs. No. No. No. No. No.