Every social network should have a button for “Stop trying to be clever with algorithms and just show me the posts of everyone I follow, in the order they were posted.”
My therapist once told me that she believed one of the biggest misconceptions about kink was that people turning their fears and past traumas into sexual fantasies were somehow weak or still broken.
“I think what you do is incredible,” she’d said, “because you are taking back that narrative. You’re making it your own. You are asserting control over it and making it operate on your terms, in the service of you.”
But it is still bewildering to dig beneath some fantasy I have and find at its root something that utterly terrifies me.