Shit to wear to answer the door when the pizza comes.

I flirted with someone tonight for like twenty minutes with my skirt on backwards.

If anyone needs me I’ll be hiding forever.

mahimahi713:

ben-c:

things i hate:

transphobes

institutionalized racism

banana strings

If you peel the banana from the bottom, you will not get the strings

brilliant. do u have solutions for the other two

aminaabramovic:

I open this app the way a disgruntled and jaded old man opens the newspaper in the morning

luellaarbre:

submissivefeminist:

misskeeliebradshaw:

submissivefeminist:

Originally posted by thevannydevito

Hello
It’s me
I was wondering if you could send some pictures of your feet.
I won’t pay you
Anything
Because my dick is really horny, and that’s all we really need.

You’re precious, holy fuck.

Im fucking dying