We just had a pretty frank conversation with each other. I know I talk way too much about us, but I’m at this awful tipping point and I just don’t know what’s happening. We miss each other. We love each other. And that really, really sucks. Seriously. 

Because, facts upon facts, we can’t make it work right now. And it would easier to be like “oh, blah, you weren’t worth my time”. But it’s hard to shake the fact that I feel like maybe it was worth some more effort. 

And he’s saying stuff like “I’ll probably always regret ending this” and he keeps blaming himself for all this and I really don’t know what to do with myself. Because I can’t let go of people. I can’t. It’s like a clinical sickness that we’ve failed to place in the DSM IV. 

I’m sorry I’ve strayed away from the sexiness and playfulness that I was trying to achieve with this tumblr. But, ugh, this all came about and I just can’t figure out what I want to do with myself. Part of me is like “oh, goodie, freedom” and part of me is having such a huge problem with figuring out what the hell to do with myself.

I know I’ve been very light about the whole situation in the past. Even when I mentioned the negative about it, I tried to stay positive. But, God, it’s getting so difficult and neither of us are handling it very well at all.

Sorry for the rambling. Seriously. Feel free to skip this sucker over.