Him: I want to buy [a vibrating egg].
Me: For your butt?
Him: But I’m not sure if I should. The dilemma, if I buy it…would it be gross if I use it on two girls? Like one relationship…then another?
Me: Hahahaha.
Him: Is that sort of thing okay? Because I don’t want to buy another.
Me: Usually the girl sort of keeps it after it’s been inside of her.
Him: Yeah, but I want that shit.
Me: Yeah, probably not happening.
Him: Not even if I clean it?
Me: Not even if you clean it.
Him: Guess I’ll have to have a long-term relationship, then. Balls. Same deal with gags? Or are they okay because it’s just spit?
Me: Nah, not the same with gags, I don’t think.
Him: I mean there’ll be spit on my dick. So I figure it’s okay.
Me: Oh my God stop.