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New Year’s Eve: Part 6

Let me tell you, tumblr, Grad was damn good at spooning. A regular pro.

We laid there for a while and talked more. We started kissing. We tried to fall asleep. We failed.

He wound up rubbing my back, then reaching down and rubbing elsewhere. I tried to keep quiet, I wasn’t sure if anyone else was sleeping down in the basement. I bucked lightly against his hand. 

“You’re really different than other people,” Grad said.

I chuckled, “you’re in love with me.” I’d been teasing him about it since we’d started talking. He’d make a comment, pay me a compliment, look at me too long and I’d say that. 

For how random it was, there was something kind of sweet about hooking up with Grad. I don’t know. He’s a good guy. I guess we exchanged numbers, because I found his text the next morning. It’s horrible to admit, but I don’t think I’ll be calling him in the future. I just wouldn’t know what to say without being awkward.

And for that reason among others, I think I’m going to stop my random hookups for a while. I think Grad was a lovely note to end on for now.

New Year’s Eve: Part 5

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This gent, who turned out to be a grad student and in a band (so we’re calling him Grad), and I wound up talking into the better part of the morning. He told me about what he was working on, I shared woes over having to do research. 

I was drunk and comfortable enough that I sang. He said he was in a band and I forget why but I started singing. I think he asked me if I could do anything musical, but I just wound up crooning to this guy on a floor at three in the morning.

He was nice, relaxed, confident, comfortable. He was mature. He was an adult. A lot of guys I go to school with are children now, it’s why I tend to be more attracted to the female half of my age demographic when working within the frame of college fun.

At some point in the middle of the conversation, some guy sat down with us and asked me for advice. “My girlfriend’s so insecure,” he said.

“Why are you telling me this?" 

He shrugged, "because you don’t seem insecure at all.”

It was weird to hear. I guess it was because I was singing or because I was drunk, but I normally wouldn’t say I’m not insecure. I have my moments, but as this tumblr constantly highlights, I’m constantly second-guessing myself, my lifestyle, my choices.

“That was weird,” I told Grad after the guy left.

Grad checked his watch, “we should get some sleep.” It was almost five in the morning.

I believe Grad was the first man since the first grade to try to erect me a blanketfort “worthy for me to sleep in”.