Hahahaha best question EVER. I ate it in the car on the way.

Be authentic, but don’t just put it all out there. Stay away from controversial topics. Dress nicely, be polite, be gracious. Gird your loins.

Hey, pouty. I hate to say this, but these feelings never fully go away. Sometimes, you’ll have amazing successes. Sometimes, you’ll feel serious compersion. But, you’ll always sometimes find yourself jealous or scared or selfish.

Here are some things that have helped me:

1. COMMUNICATE. Even when it’s hard, even when you feel like you’re selfish, even when you’d rather just not. Speak your feelings and hear your partner’s out fairly. Try not to be judgmental. Try not to be hurtful.
2. Find something that can be your “space” with your primary partner. A special time where it’s just you two talking, a special restaurant that’s just for you, songs that are just yours to share. It can help to keep something feeling “sacred” or just yours. 
3. Try to schedule poly activities simultaneously. He or she is out for a drink with a new hottie? Go dancing with somebody cute who’s been flirting with you. 
4. And, if possible, meet up afterwards for your own little post-date date. 
5. Have a special check-in time, maybe once every week or two weeks, to talk about the stuff you’re doing. 
6. Keeping a journal can be massively helpful. Whether or not you share it is up to you.
7. Sometimes, it can help to start the journey together. Maybe with a couple who swings that you both are into?

Good luck!!!

What a great question. Looking back, gosh, my knee-jerk response would just be to take a big eraser to some experiences. But part of me remembers one of my favorite movies, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, and I consider that had I not learned my lessons and experienced that pain, I would make the same mistakes again. 

Oh, funny story. Most Ivy League schools offer MFA programs in at least one kind of fine art. It just happened that mine didn’t have a program at my school. But one of the best MFA programs for studio art is at Yale, Brown and Columbia both boast amazing MFAs for writing, and Harvard’s MFA for acting is considered one of the best in the world. 

So, uh, what were you saying?

Oh! Ohh! Sorry!

Don’t be. I was so nervous myself, for real. If you’re particularly small or tight, lubricant helps out a lot. Also, ask your partner to go nice and slow with you and to rub your clit while they penetrate you. Warming up with fingers is also a great route to go.

Also, penises are just kind of creepy and horrifying to look at sometimes. Honestly. No shame there.

Oh gosh, that’s an oldie! But, thank you!

So, non-monogamy isn’t for everybody. But, hey, sounds like maybe you’re rearing up to give it a try, huh? 😉