It wasn’t really a decision against monogamy as it was a decision to be non-monogamous. 

Sir and I were monogamous for a good chunk of our relationship. We were good at it – if there’s a way to be “good” at that sort of thing – and we were very happy.

But we’re also really happy exploring relationships with other people. And while it’s not a matter of the fact that whether we could ever be monogamous, it’s more a realization that we really don’t want to be. I like my Daddy a whole lot and I’m liking exploring stuff with this new partner. He is having a great time with his partners as well.

For as hard as it can be, there’s also some really rewarding things that come with non-monogamy that make it less of the anti-monogamy and something entirely separate. We’re both seeing the benefits of cultivating relationships with other people and seeing how fun, exciting, sexy and fulfilling it can be. It’s no so much that we’re not able to handle monogamy, it’s more that we find non-monogamy, for all its difficulties, really enjoyable.

If you’re looking to be non-monogamous with someone who you consider to be a primary partner, I would even argue that it’s not something you can do until you’re sure you can be monogamous with them. Or, at the very least, until you’re sure that the relationship has established firm pillars of trust and communication. When these things have been established, non-monogamy won’t just test them, but strengthen them. When they haven’t, they’re usually what absolutely destroys a non-monogamous relationship.

Of course, non-monogamy doesn’t work for everyone. But, right now, we’re finding that it works pretty well for us.

Not to mention sometimes we have some pretty awesome threesomes.