femsubdenial:

Thank you for apologizing, but… why me?

Okay… well… I have three answers to this: (1) We all want perfect, (2) nobody’s perfect, and (3) stop wasting your time worrying about this stuff so just decide to pad one of your breasts or not and go live.

First answer: Like it or not, humans and (I think nearly all animals) are attracted to symmetry, to the point that even your choice of clothing can make a small but measurable difference. Here’s advice from a professional stripper to would-be strippers:

One thing that I cannot emphasize enough- NEVER ever wear an asymmetrical dress (hem cut at an angle or one shoulder strap). As most people know, men subconsciously look at certain physical attributes as signs of good genetics and a desirable partner – boobs, hips etc. They also look for something anthropologists call “Bilateral Symmetry” which means that your arms and legs are the same length, your torso is straight etc. An asymmetrical dress throws this off. It may look nice but you can actually chart the drop in earnings on a night to night basis.

Second: Everybody has some degree of asymmetry! Take a look at anyone not wearing make-up and you’ll see differences in their face, especially around the eyes. Breast asymmetry is very, very common and if you don’t believe me you can jfgi! Contrary to my first answer, unless you’re making money with your body, it’s simply negligible compared to everything else. Most guys won’t notice, and the ones that notice and care are pretty-much-by-definition the shallow guys who aren’t worth fucking might be fun to fuck but who’s opionion shouldn’t affect you either way.

My third answer is a bit more general and can be best expressed with two minutes of Katt Williams. I can’t endorse most of what he says but these 114 seconds are spot on. 🙂

Or just don’t give two and a half fucks about it? If you find an asymmetrical dress you love, fucking wear the shit out of it. If you feel sexier in one of those custom bras that evens you out, wear one. If you feel sexy as an asymmetrical woman, be a goddamn asymmetrical woman.

My roommate in college had a third nipple in her goddamn armpit (apparently this is actually a common thing to happen) and the best day ever was when she was like, “fuck it, I am really warm” and started wearing some freaking tank tops. Her boyfriend finds it cute and charming because he’s a fucking grown-up and loves everything about her because this is the woman he loves. And anyway who cares what men are looking at? 

Even if you’re making money with your body, oh well. If somebody’s being a goddamn eugenicist when he’s debating whether or not he wants to buy you a drink, throw one in his damn face. If he doesn’t like your porn, he can find other porn. There are people with serious disabilities still making some sexy-ass porn and sharing their beautiful bodies with the world.

Listen, I get it. I’ve got tons of issues with my body, and it’s so much easier to preach it than to live it. But you are so much more than your appearance, regardless of whether or not your career is based on it.