Unfortunately, I was sort of “discovered” by my mother when I was much younger and when I just had some vague inklings, so I wound up having to admit it and confide in her about it. It wasn’t sexual for me yet, but my mother was still very scared and upset. I told her it was a lot about risk, trust, danger, loss of control, etc. And, of course, to a parent, this sounds absolutely like a recipe for disaster, murder, accidents, and so on.

When we talked about it more recently – she kind of awkwardly brought it up – she was worried that I might be running off to crazy clubs in strange places and letting complete strangers beat me within an inch of my life (not my thing). While she still does not completely understand it, I think she’s learned to be more accepting of it and that I know what I’m doing/what I want/how to take care of myself. It’s still terribly awkward and sometimes I wish she didn’t know.

But, yes, I very much appreciate the trust and the risk, it’s a lot of what gets me. 

Thank you for reaching out to me. I hope I answered your question. Have a wonderful new year.

<3, Ivy