Personal post about the dry spell I’m going through below the cut ~

So, I have loooong dry spells, which I define as long periods of time without being physically turned on by anything. And tbh, I fee like the longer the dry spell the more disgruntled and dissatisfied and bored I get. And it’s an issue with me, not with the people around me or the images I’m viewing or anything.

I’m asexual, in the sense that I don’t feel sexual attraction towards other people and am fully repulsed and a bit terrified by the idea of having sex. But I do still experience situational sexual arousal, and have zero qualms with masturbating. When I do feel turned on, it is so intense, especially when it’s in a D/s kind of setting, and I love it. It’s a feeling that’s unmatched by most things. Sometimes, I will go for a while where I get turned on really frequently. Everything seems like an innuendo to me and I’m okay with that. I’ve had periods where I’m inexplicably horny constantly for days at a time, and it’s phenomenal, even if incredibly distracting.

The problem is, I either become desensitized to it after a certain amount of time, or I lose whatever it is that makes me able to get turned on, or I overthink it, or I get scared that people will think I want to have sex with them… I don’t know the reason, just that it just doesn’t happen anymore. When I try to look at porn that would otherwise have me hot and bothered, it does nothing for me. When I masturbate, it is exceedingly disappointing and far too long of a process for it to be worth it. And I want it to be different… But it just isn’t.

I may be asexual, but that doesn’t mean I don’t get frustrated when I have a dry spell. This time last year I was participating in Denial December, but it didn’t even cross my mind to try, because I haven’t even had in interest in orgasms anyways.

I doubt anyone does, but if you have any experience in this area, tips would be greatly appreciated. Otherwise, thanks for listening. I’ll try to get back on my porn game soon.