Been a while since my last Denial December update. I still haven’t had an orgasm since my ruined on day 18, and I haven’t been all that desperate either, until I started feeling pretty horny yesterday. I think my ovulation is coming up within the next few days, so I’m starting to really feel it again. I teased a bit yesterday, then teased quite a bit more this morning. I’m following femsubdenial’s recommendation to embrace the gift of orgasm denial and lean into the frustration. It’s working… I’m quite frustrated, and quite happy to be frustrated, at the moment.
I don’t know if I want to come January 1st or if I want to stay this way. I just, I really do want to have an orgasm, but i just feel like I’m only truly a sexual person when I am in this state, teasing frequently and coming never. Once I have an orgasm, I tend to lose interest in sex stuff for a few days, at least. Usually longer. I’m torn. Maybe I’ll wait until I really, really want in in January, be it at the beginning of the month or later on. Like, not come until I hit the state of I-would-hump-my-brains-out-on-anything-and-I-can-feel-my-pulse-all-the-way-up-to-my-uterus.
Decisions, decisions… I guess I’ll see what happens.
Good girl!
“I-would-hump-my-brains-out-on-anything-and-I-can-feel-my-pulse-all-the-way-up-to-my-uterus.” Sounds like a great goal to me. 🙂 Of course… once you reach that state, you might enjoy it so much you don’t want to let it go…
I have to admit, I love that state. I don’t reach it all that often. I hit it really early on in the month of December while I was in denial, and it was so much fun. It’s like super intense sub-space. But sometimes I will stew in that state for hours and then if I finally to come it feels sooo fucking good… Like wow. But I never completely want to leave that state. So… I guess we’ll see how much self control I have once January hits x3