So it appears I’ve whispered “switchette” three times while looking into a mirror and conjured several Real People (which is to say, people who know me in real life) to follow this blog.
And this is giving me a couple feelings that I want to address. Two feelings, to be precise.
- Vulnerability: This tumblr started out as a personal journey. Literally no one I knew was aware of it but me. I created a lot of posts and reblogs and comments that touch on my real and true and exploratory and secret self. I figured I would keep it secret forever and ever.
- Pride: Apparently “forever and ever” is equivalent to approximately one year. Shortly after creating this blog, I got tired of imagining and started dipping my feet into the local kink community, and I’ve been at it like gangbusters since then. I went to an kink event this summer that changed me irrevocably; I started actively opening my quietly-poly relationship; I met and continue to meet really awesome people who push and support new parts of me; I started the process of learning to love my body; and guys, also: crop tops. (Crop tops are AMAZING!) I’m really proud of myself for taking the leap and becoming more like the tumblr bloggers whom I admire.
While sometimes knowing that I’m sharing perceived intimacies with people who know me gives me some shame (most often of the delicious variety that warms faces and wets panties), I generally forge on because this is my space.
I post dirty, pretty, mean, moist kinky things. I post gorgeous and inspiring people of color. I post a lot about racial and gender inequality and structural, institutional, and internalized oppression. I post about relationships. I post kink & sex ed. I post the occasional nerd reference, uplifting or commiserating quote, and absurd joke.
But most of all, I post for myself. Maintaining a safe space for me is of vital importance, and so I won’t waste any emotional energy defending my right to any of my posts or beliefs. Because here, I say what I want. For me, this is a space to experiment with what being wholly me might look like while I continue to evolve and to peel back the layers in other spaces in my life.
Thanks for being here with me.
And special thanks to thinkivykink, @herdirtylittleheart, and the ever-supportive ohokaybueno for modeling boldness and the adventure of selfhood before I was ready to.
