So No One Ever Thought it Pertinent to Mention There’s a Biopic of Franz Mesmer Starring Alan Rickman?

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diaryofasnowflake:

So it turns out as a movie it is pretty problematic and shitty but a good 25% of it is Alan Rickman wearing swishy cloaks trancing (or something like it) ladies who realllllyyyyyy seem to enjoy it.  But he just keeps whining about healing the world and science and stuff.

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This is for science.

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And medicine.

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Not sexy at all.

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SHE WANTS THE T. (T=trance)

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Goddamn that little handhold in a hypno context can just be the most intimate thing.

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Ugh Hans Gruber Snape Mesmer Rickman stop making me love you.

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Not sexual.  Nope.

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NOTE This character is pretty much moaning at this point.  Because getting your blindness treated is hawt.

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Prettttttty sure I do something like this in trance.

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I guess this could be kinky but she’s already blind.

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Like I said, there’s a lotta dis.

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AW YEAH GET IT GURL AND BY “IT” I MEAN YOUR VISION AND THERFORE AN EYEFUL OF SEXY HYPNOTIST ALAN RICKMAN.

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ALL THE FRENCH ROYAL LADIES WANT THE T.

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Same.

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Wait I think I saw a porno like this once.

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WHAT THE FUCK HE IS MAKING A ROOM FULL OF FRENCH LADIES HAVE AN ORGASM.  THIS MOVIE IS NOT EVEN PRETENDING MESMERISM ISN’T SEXUAL.  WHAT IS GOING ON.  WHY IS THIS MOVIE SHITTY/GREAT?

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YOU TOO ALAN?

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GREATEST.

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MOVIE.

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SCENE.

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EVER.

In conclusion: Thank you, Dr. Mesmer.  You hoped your work would cure suffering and disease, and eventually your legacy resulted in freaks like me getting off on it.  And you got a shitty biopic that was kinda hot in a weird way, even by hypnofetishist standards.  Mazel tov.

Also, Alan Rickman can get it.

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SWAG

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