for 2015:
- learn to unapologetically say no.
- read, read, read, read. read
- write more. write about everything.
- pick up your camera again
- tell more stories
- keep ur skin moisturized
- appreciate every square centimeter of ur body
- don’t give a shit about what others think of u
- be patient. be thankful.
- life is not a competition. stop treating it like one.
- have more solo dance parties in ur room
Month: December 2014
Whenever someone asks me why I don’t have a boyfriend, I’m just going to show them this. Racism and classism (and misogyny and transphobia and internalized homophobia) is so rampant among men in my community.
This is like 99 percent of the white men i’ve ever dated and i’ve dated a lot of white men.
White women are the same way. I can’t count how many times I’ve been told that I “don’t sound black” or that I’m “like, the whitest black person I(they) know.” I’m sick and fucking tired of this shit. I’m light-skinned, but I won’t be your compromise, your half-black go-between. I am not your rebellious phase to piss off your parents.
Sorry, but this is a sore spot for me.
“I usually don’t date black girls, but you’re hot”
That’s because you’re black, but you assimilate well into white society, that way they can say they have a black friend without having actually like black people who don’t act strictly in the way they want.
Because I’m black, I’ll never really ‘assimilate” to white society. I’ll always be a nigga to many white people. i’m just one of the good niggas.
2015 goals:
- take more selfies
- dress up more
- be more optimistic
- do more art, improve, improve, improve
- take no shit
- love myself more
- love myself more
Milky Way || © || Robert D’Costa ||
7 Things Your Colorblind Racist Friend Might Say to You and How to Respond | Atlanta Black Star
Link7 Things Your Colorblind Racist Friend Might Say to You and How to Respond | Atlanta Black Star
1) Colorblind
What they say:
“People are just people.” ”I don’t see color.” ”We’re all just human.” “Character, not color, is what counts with me.”
Response:
“Colorblindness” negates the cultural values, norms, expectations and life experiences of people of color. Even if an individual white person can ignore a person’s skin color, society does not.
Claiming to be “colorblind” can also be a defense when someone is afraid to discuss racism, especially if the assumption is that all conversation about race or color is racist. Color consciousness does not equal racism.
2) Reverse Racism
What they say:
“Blacks cry ‘racism’ for everything, even though they are more or just as racist as white people.”
Response:
Let’s first define racism with this formula: Racism = racial prejudice + systemic institutional power.
To say people of color can be racist, denies the power imbalance inherent in racism. Although some Black people dislike whites and act on that prejudice to insult or hurt them, that’s not the same as systematically oppressing them and negatively affecting every aspect of their lives.
People of color, as a social group, do not possess the societal, institutional power to oppress white people as a group. An individual Black person who is abusing a white person, while clearly wrong, is acting out a personal racial prejudice, not racism.
3) It’s Not Race
What they say:
“It’s not race, it’s economics.” ”Classism is the new racism.”
Response:
“Being Black and middle class is fundamentally different to being white and middle class.” This is what Dr. Nicola Rollock, a researcher at The Institute of Education at the University at Birmingham in the U.K., said after researching the issue.
For the report, “The Educational Strategies of the Black Middle Classes,” Rollock and her team looked at African-Caribbean families in particular, and confirmed that there is a Black “middle class” who work very hard to do the best for their children. But researchers also discovered that social status and relative wealth do not protect Black people from racism.
Racism is a reality in the lives of Black middle-class families and it extends to the upper class too, as Oprah Winfrey would agree based on her widely reported racial-profiling incident at a Zurich boutique last year.
4) Blame the Victim
What they say:
“Blacks are not willing to work hard.” ”Blacks feel entitled and want everything handed to them.” ”Blacks hold themselves back, not racism.” “We have advertised everywhere, there just aren’t any qualified Blacks for this job.”
Response:
When blame-the-victim tactics are used, it provides an escape from discussing the real problem: racism. Therefore, the agents of racism, white people and their institutions, can avoid acknowledging a system of oppression exists.
As long as the focus remains on Black folks, white people can minimize or dismiss our experiences and never have to deal with their responsibility or collusion in racism and white privilege.
5) Deny, Deny, Deny
What they say:
“Blacks are unfairly favored, whites are not.”
Response:
This form of denial is based on the false notion that the playing field is now level. When some white folks are expected to suddenly share their privilege, access and advantage, they often perceive it as discrimination. White people’s attacks on programs like affirmative action and Black History Month are usually rooted in this false perception.
6) Pull Yourself Up by Your Bootstraps
What they say:
“America is the land of opportunity, built by rugged individuals, where anyone with grit can succeed if they just pull up hard enough on their bootstraps. So Blacks need to pull themselves up from the bottom like everyone else.”
Response:
U.S. social propaganda has convinced many people that an individual’s hard work is the main determinant of success in the country. This ideology totally denies the impact of either oppression or privilege on any person’s chance for success, and pretends that every individual, regardless of color, gender, disability, etc., has the same access to the rights, benefits and responsibilities of society.
It also implies that Blacks have only their individual character flaws or cultural inadequacies to blame, and not racism.
7) Racism Is Over
What they say:
“Blacks live in the past. We dealt with racism in the 1960s with all the marches, sit-ins and speeches by Martin Luther King Jr. Laws have been changed. Segregation and lynching have ended. We have some details to work out, but real racism is pretty much a thing of the past. They need to get over it and move on.”
Response:
The absence of legalized, enforced segregation does not mean the end of racism. This denial of contemporary racism, based on an inaccurate assessment of both history and current society, romanticizes the past and diminishes today’s reality.
If there is no race problem, there would be no school-to-prison pipeline in Mississippi that leads to the arrest and sentencing of Black students for infractions as insignificant as wearing the wrong color socks.
New York City’s Stop and Frisk policy that led to 400,000 police encounters with innocent Black and Latino New Yorkers, would not have happened.
If there is no race problem, why is a Black person 3.73 times more likely to be arrested for marijuana possession than a white person, even though Blacks and whites use marijuana at similar rates?
Sexualities/Genders (And Other Terms One Should Know)
ChatHeterosexual: Male-identifying individual sexually attracted to a female-identifying individual, and vice-versa.
Homosexual: Someone attracted to someone of the same gender as themselves.
Bisexual: Sexually attracted to two or more genders.
Polysexual: Sexually attracted to many genders, but not all.
Pansexual: Sexually attracted to all genders. (this and bisexual, and sometimes polysexual, are often considered to be the same thing and different people may simply identify as any one of them due to their own personal reasons)
Demisexual: Sexually attracted to people only after forming a bond with them first.
Asexual: Having no /sexual attraction/ to others; having no desire to have sex.
Heteroromantic: Male-identifying individual romantically attracted to female-identifying individuals, and vice-versa.
Homoromantic: Attracted romantically to the same gender.
Biromantic: Attracted romantically to two or more genders
Polyromantic: Attracted to many genders (but not all)
Panromantic: Attracted romantically to all genders
Demiromantic: Romantically attracted to people only after forming a bond with them first.
Aromantic: Having no /romantic attraction/ to others; having no desire to be in a romantic relationship.
Polyamorous: Someone who is attracted to, and is comfortable with being in a relationship with more than one person at a time.
Transexual/Transgender (Term depending on generation and location): An individual who identifies as a gender other than the one they were assigned at birth to be. Often shortened to trans
Cisgender: Someone who identifies as the gender that they were assigned as at birth. (ex. matches their birth certificate) Often shortened to cis
Intersex: Someone who has ambiguous genitalia that doesn’t fit into our strict dichotomy of uterus or testes. Often forced into surgery to correct their genitals at a very young age, causing psychological and physical harm later in life
Nonbinary: Outside of the gender binary of male and female. (Can be used as an umbrella term or as its own identity)
Genderqueer: Outside of the gender binary. (**This is not an umbrella term like the post said before I edited it! Do not use this as an umbrella term for nonbinary individuals, simply use ‘nonbinary’. Queer is considered a slur and not everyone likes to be associated with the word)
Agender: Someone who feels gender neutral, or someone who experiences a ‘lack’ of gender.
Bigender: Someone who identifies as two separate genders.
Trigender: Someone who identifies as three separate genders.
Genderfluid: A gender that changes, or is ‘fluid’.
Demigirl: Identifying partially as a woman, but not wholly.
Demiboy/guy: Identifying partially as a man, but not wholly.
Dmab: Designated Male at Birth.
Dfab: Designated Female at Birth.
Amab/Afab: Same as dmab/dmab, except with ‘assigned’ instead of ‘designated’.
Camab/Cafab: Same as previous, except prefixed by ‘coercively’, to highlight the lack of choice.
Reblog to inform! And if there’s any I missed or anything that should be clarified, please message me! Always looking to expand the proper vocab. 🙂
**I edited this post because it used some archaic and incorrect terms/definitions, and needed more terms added to it. -Vivian Mareepe