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bdsmgallery:

This is just breathtaking!

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bdsmgeek:

Purple and pink no knot karada #1, with miniature-minx. Ropes from bdsmgeekshop

An old Dom-With-Pen post – the one that meant the most to me, the one I saved and still reread, the one that speaks so much truth…

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carrispen:

consort-of-the-queen:

vaginaandmagirl:

subgirlygirl:

vaginaandmagirl:

caughtupinthisloveaffair:

vaginaandmagirl:

The original source to this doesn’t exist anymore. (I have this a couple other of DwP’s posts saved away on my notes on my phone; I was too afraid to trust tumblr with them in drafts as we all know how well its other functionalities perform sometimes.) This is the post that made me cry the first time I read it and think – “I need this.” This is the post I sent to my husband tentatively, knowing it’s how we worked in spirit – but it wasn’t how we functioned at the time. This is the post that taught me things could be different – they could be better. I am forever grateful.

“It’s bedtime when I say it’s bedtime.”

“The last few months have been tough on our D/s dynamic. We’ve both been busy, and it’s easy to fall back into old habits. When I’m not around to take care of girl, I feel less entitled to make demands of her. When I feel less entitled, I make fewer rules. When there are fewer rules, girl becomes accustomed to making decisions for herself. Some of them are bad decisions. I blame myself. I withdraw. The cycle repeats. I’m not proud of it. It’s easy to write about this life—it’s much more difficult to actually live it.

Last week was a perfect example. I was on two deadlines, busy as hell, and I asked girl to do two things. Just two. She failed to do both. I don’t blame her; she’s submissive. She doesn’t respond to demands. She responds to rules and consequences. Boundaries and support. Control and protection. Asking girl to do something when there is no perceived consequence gives her no thrill of success, no satisfaction of having done the right thing. In other words, demands are empty.

Last weekend, I vowed to restore the balance. On Friday night, I pulled girl into my arms.

“I haven’t been taking very good care of you,” I said.

“No, it’s me,” she said. “I was supposed to cook and wash dishes.”

“Hey,” I said. “I’m the one who sets the rules around here, and I’m the one who enforces them. If something goes wrong, it’s my responsibility. So, that changes as of right now. You’re going to be in bed by 11 all this week, and you’re going to cook and do the dishes when I ask, or I’m going to spank your ass.” She giggled. I put my hand on her ass. “I’m not kidding.”

She stopped giggling.

That was all it took. All weekend, she was cooking, cleaning, doing dishes unasked, and bringing me another beer before I had asked for one. In short, she was behaving correctly. Being the wife I’ve always wanted, and have worked hard to support.

On a normal weekday, I get up hours before girl does, so her bedtime is often after I’ve gone to sleep. I sensed that something was up last night, so I set an alarm for five minutes before her bedtime.
girl didn’t come to bed until 11:25. So, when she walked into the bedroom, I sat up, slid to the edge of the bed, and patted my lap. She groaned.

“I set bedtimes for your own good,” I said. “Don’t pretend I’m a tyrant. Now come here.” Her groan became a whine. It’s part of her brattiness—and I tolerate it. Some Dominants don’t, but I do. When girl is bratty or resistant, it’s simply an acknowledgment of my authority. She’s saying, “I don’t like this, but I’m submitting to it.” Frankly, it gets me kind of hot.

I took her over my knee, pinned her hands at the small of her back, hiked up her boy shorts, and spanked her ass once for every minute she was up past her bedtime. As I always do, I made her ask for the last two spanks. It’s my way of reminding her that she is complicit in her spanking. That, even though it’s unpleasant, it’s something she wants.

When I was finished, I fixed her panties and took her into my arms. We talked. We laughed. She was cuddly, warm, and compliant—in short, she was my girl again. She expressed gratitude—not for the spanking, I knew, but for the consistency. The support and authority I was standing up to provide. It wouldn’t have been the same if I hadn’t taken responsibility for the failures of the past month. I’m in charge—so I take the failures. But all the successes are hers.

Footnote: spanking girl arouses me beyond belief. I got almost NO sleep last night, because I went to bed unsatisfied. But I felt it was important not to sexualize this spanking. After a spanking, I almost always end up taking her—taking her very hard.This time, I just wanted her to feel safe, secure, and submissive, without the sexual undertones. I wanted to begin to reshape her emotional make up to remind her that not only can she rely on me, but that I’m in charge. That she is to defer to me. Trust me. Obey me.”

The parts that always resonate with me the most:

“…she’s submissive. She doesn’t respond to demands. She responds to rules and consequences. Boundaries and support. Control and protection. Asking girl to do something when there is no perceived consequence gives her no thrill of success, no satisfaction of having done the right thing.”

“We talked. We laughed. She was cuddly, warm, and compliant—in short, she was my girl again. She expressed gratitude—not for the spanking, I knew, but for the consistency. The support and authority I was standing up to provide. It wouldn’t have been the same if I hadn’t taken responsibility for the failures of the past month. I’m in charge—so I take the failures. But all the successes are hers.”

I understand that this is a lifestyle that works for a lot of people, but when it goes beyond sexual, that’s when it becomes distasteful to me. Adults don’t need someone to make rules for them and give them bedtimes and require them to cook and clean. If I cook and clean for someone, it’s because I want to, not because I’m going to be punished if I don’t. An adult being punished for not going to bed when they’re told honestly makes my skin crawl. I completely understand that some people really enjoy the sexual component of a dominant submissive relationship, but this just sounds controlling and abusive and ick. There’s a difference.

You’re right. There is an absolute difference between what you describe and what it actually is.

For one, this phrase – “If I cook and clean for someone, it’s because I want to, not because I’m going to be punished if I don’t.” – completely indicates you don’t understand the consensual side of power exchange. Because giving my husband that level of control IS “because I want to.” I don’t need to explain that to you anymore than I need to explain any other of my choices, but for some reason, you seem to negate my agency and the consensual nature of the dynamic and equate it with abuse.

For two, the consensual D/s relationship where one person submits to the guidance and leadership of a trusted other is nothing like “[needing] someone to make rules for them and give them bedtimes and require them to cook and clean.” If that’s what you get from it, then I understand your distaste. You’ve missed the heart of the consensual dynamic completely and leveled it into something you associate solely with abuse and sex. Which is unfortunate, because in its beauty, it’s simply asking the person you care and trust the most with your well-being to hold you accountable and to help you achieve your goals. At its core, it’s very committed, loving, and full of solid communication between the two involved – all the marks of healthy relationship.

For what it’s worth: I am not denying some Dominant/submissive relationships aren’t abusive. Nor am I saying they are all perfect. But abuse in such a relationship is likely as common as abuse in ANY relationship dynamic. To lump the consensual D/s dynamic in with them shows, at best, a lack of understanding about what the dynamic actually is and, at worst, a judgmental attitude towards the lifestyle of two consenting adults. If anything is “ick,” it’s that.

Perfect.

Kip knows what’s up! 🙌

It got better? Yep. It did.

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little-fuckbunny:

on-her-knees-to-please:

rapethemasses:

Daddy had caught her touching herself in the shower this morning, so he had to punish her. He tied her up against the stair railing, a vibrator on the highest setting pressed mercilessly against her already tender clit, and forced her to finish what she had started. At first it was glorious. She grinded up against the vibrator head, moaning and squirming with delight. Her Daddy stood over her with his arms crossed, supervising her punishment. She looked up at him with wide eyes as orgasms washed over her body, sending her into extreme pleasure.

She knew the ecstasy wouldn’t last. After the sixth or seventh orgasm, it began to be too much. Her body was shaking uncontrollably, her hips grinding against the sensation whether she liked it or not. She screamed with forced pleasure again and again until she could barely breathe. Daddy loved to give her a taste of her own whorish medicine, forcing her to enduring hours of clit-torturing punishment. By the end she was begging and pleading for it to stop, for her pussy to be shown some mercy.

Daddy leaned down and pet her sweating, exhausted body with a soft smile.

“Only three more hours to go, baby.“ 

This. Is. So. Hot.

Oh. Wow. 😳 that’s incredible

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eyes-forever-blue:

💙💋💙