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thebibliosphere:

Whenever I see posts like “I just want to fall asleep in your arms” I always think “you’ve never tried to get a decent nights sleep with someone else’s weight against you”.

So just in case you’re worried that somehow you’re not normal because sharing your sleeping space with someone doesn’t grant you the serenity of the stars on a clear night, let me tell you a thing, as someone who is very much deeply in love with their partner.

You will not find yourself in someone else. You may find a part of who you are in relation to who they are, but you will not find the true sum and total of who you are. It’s okay to not feel overwhelming peace in the arms of another, it’s okay not to find your mind quieted by their mere presence alone. It’s okay to be irritated that you’re trying to sleep and their energy is too warm beside you, too near, their breathing too quick, their limbs restless. It’s okay to get up and go sleep on the couch because sometimes you don’t want to contend with elbows and knees and twitching feet. That’s okay, it’s okay that every night is not salvation through tranquility and searing bodily worship of each other. I guess what im saying is, it’s perfectly normal to love someone and still want personal space, because personal space is important. And so few romantic idealized posts acknowledge this. You do not need to be conjoined at the hip and find perfection in every gesture to know what love is. Love is in fact, the opposite.

Like not holding a pillow over their head at one am because they’ve just kicked you for the second time and stolen all the blankets because you’re too pretty for prison and you’re 99.999% certain you’d miss them.

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