romanticdominant-deactivated201:

When Tori and I were first starting to explore D/s, I worried myself sick that I would indeed hurt her at some point and never be able to forgive myself.

She is my world and I love her more than life so, yes, it was a VERY difficult thing to reconcile in my head. I love her, but I hit her? WTF?

For a long time, I discounted the idea that anyone could find pleasure through pain, but I have had to eat those words. Please don’t misunderstand, I would NEVER, EVER really harm Tori, but within the confines of safe, sane and consensual play, rough, dominant behavior from me took our sex to a level I could never have imagined.

What I came to understand and accept was that the level of force Tori and I needed was not something that could cause real damage. For us, dominance and control was what made our D/s work.

In addition, we ALWAYS approached anything new slowly and with great caution. She had her safeword and I absolutely trusted her to use it if things went too far and she absolutely trusted me to stop immediately if she used it.

Whenever we play, her safety is my first priority. I NEVER scene with her if my head isn’t completely in the right zone. Anger, frustration, impatience etc. have no place in D/s. You must be in control of your emotions, the scene, everything or postpone till you’re ready.